Can boosting GRATITUDE help us build INFLUENCE? (Episode 170)

With Laura Cox Kaplan
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Show Notes

Title: Can understanding & boosting sources of GRATITUDE help us build INFLUENCE? (Episode 170)

THIS WEEK’S TOPIC:  Like so many of you, my thoughts are on GRATITUDE this week. As I reflected on the topic and dug into the science behind gratitude and why and how it can impact our lives, I found an undeniable link to building and sustaining INFLUENCE. Skeptical? Join me! I’m solo this week, and sharing some science-based ideas and perspective to make your holidays more gratitude-filled, and to help you deepen connections with those who are important to you. 



THE LINK BETWEEN GRATITUDE & INFLUENCE: The link between gratitude and influence is all about connection. Connection is an essential part of building and sustaining influence. 


TWO IMPORTANT DIMENSIONS OF GRATITUDE: Experiences v. proactive sharing gratitude with others. 


GRATITUDE WORKS LIKE AN ELECTRICAL CHARGE: We experience something that makes us feel grateful. That feeling fuels a positive emotional charge. That positive charge fuels our gratitude and enables us to pass it on to someone else. In turn, that exchange creates a powerful connection, and that connection contributes to helping us build influence. 


GRATITUDE IS MOST POWERFUL WHEN IT’S OUTWARDLY FOCUSED:  There is scientific evidence that there is a greater, positive impact to both the giver of the gratitude and the receiver when it’s active and outwardly focused. 


GRATITUDE THRIVES ON “SPECIFICITY:” the more specific you are in sharing and expressing gratitude, the more authentic that feels and the greater impact that gratitude has on building a powerful connection. 


FINDING GRATITUDE IN LOSS BY EDITING & REFRAMING: So many families are feeling tremendous loss especially around the holidays. It can be helpful to reframe a painful or negative event through a lens focused on gratitude. It’s another example of the power of mindset. 


WANT TO INCREASE YOUR GRATITUDE: Consider using the gratitude questions provided below which can also be incorporated into a regular practice of journaling your gratitude. Studies have shown a significant difference between the gratitude levels of those who do and do not have a regular practice of gratitude journaling. 


MY GRATITUDE FOR YOU: Friend, as I reflect on my own gratitude, I’m thinking about YOU, and how incredibly grateful I am that you join me each week, for your kind words, support and the contributions so many of you have made to help me keep my own gratitude charged so that I can share it with others. I am truly grateful. 



Dr. Samantha Boardman (Episode 167)

“Everyday Vitality” by Dr. Samantha Boardman

“The Gratitude Project” 

The Greater Good Project

Dr. Katy Milkman Episode 169 “advice club”

List of Gratitude Questions (adapted from HBR article by Christopher Littlefield)

Ask yourself…. 

  1. What recent experience has enabled me to learn and grow? 
  2. What opportunities do I currently have that I’m grateful for? 
  3. Why physical abilities do I currently have? 
  4. What was one beautiful thing I saw today or this week? 
  5. Which people in my life am I most grateful for and why? 
  6. Who is one person that I don’t speak to often, but if I lost them it would be devastating. (Note: for a double boost of gratitude — take this prompt as a cue to reach out to that person today and write them a very specific gratitude letter about how they positively impacted your life).
  7.  What am I better at today than I was a year ago? 
  8. What material object do I use every day that I am thankful for? 
  9. What has someone done for me recently that I am grateful for? 
  10. What are the three things I am grateful for right now. 


These are also great prompts for a Thanksgiving game that’s a perfect way to involve family members of all ages.


SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS! Please let me know what you thought of the episode. You can reach me on Instagram @LauraCoxKaplan or at She Said/She Said Podcast. I’d love to hear from you! And, if you’d like to share your thoughts to help others find us, please be sure to leave a review on Itunes.  

Have a wonderful, safe, happy, and gratitude-filled Thanksgiving! 

I’ll see you next week!