Title: Can understanding & boosting sources of GRATITUDE help us build INFLUENCE? (Episode 170)
THIS WEEK’S TOPIC: Like so many of you, my thoughts are on GRATITUDE this week. As I reflected on the topic and dug into the science behind gratitude and why and how it can impact our lives, I found an undeniable link to building and sustaining INFLUENCE. Skeptical? Join me! I’m solo this week, and sharing some science-based ideas and perspective to make your holidays more gratitude-filled, and to help you deepen connections with those who are important to you.
THE LINK BETWEEN GRATITUDE & INFLUENCE: The link between gratitude and influence is all about connection. Connection is an essential part of building and sustaining influence.
TWO IMPORTANT DIMENSIONS OF GRATITUDE: Experiences v. proactive sharing gratitude with others.
GRATITUDE WORKS LIKE AN ELECTRICAL CHARGE: We experience something that makes us feel grateful. That feeling fuels a positive emotional charge. That positive charge fuels our gratitude and enables us to pass it on to someone else. In turn, that exchange creates a powerful connection, and that connection contributes to helping us build influence.
GRATITUDE IS MOST POWERFUL WHEN IT’S OUTWARDLY FOCUSED: There is scientific evidence that there is a greater, positive impact to both the giver of the gratitude and the receiver when it’s active and outwardly focused.
GRATITUDE THRIVES ON “SPECIFICITY:” the more specific you are in sharing and expressing gratitude, the more authentic that feels and the greater impact that gratitude has on building a powerful connection.
FINDING GRATITUDE IN LOSS BY EDITING & REFRAMING: So many families are feeling tremendous loss especially around the holidays. It can be helpful to reframe a painful or negative event through a lens focused on gratitude. It’s another example of the power of mindset.
WANT TO INCREASE YOUR GRATITUDE: Consider using the gratitude questions provided below which can also be incorporated into a regular practice of journaling your gratitude. Studies have shown a significant difference between the gratitude levels of those who do and do not have a regular practice of gratitude journaling.
MY GRATITUDE FOR YOU: Friend, as I reflect on my own gratitude, I’m thinking about YOU, and how incredibly grateful I am that you join me each week, for your kind words, support and the contributions so many of you have made to help me keep my own gratitude charged so that I can share it with others. I am truly grateful.
ADDITIONAL RESOURCES MENTIONED IN THE EPISODE:
Dr. Samantha Boardman (Episode 167)
“Everyday Vitality” by Dr. Samantha Boardman
Dr. Katy Milkman Episode 169 “advice club”
List of Gratitude Questions (adapted from HBR article by Christopher Littlefield):
- What recent experience has enabled me to learn and grow?
- What opportunities do I currently have that I’m grateful for?
- Why physical abilities do I currently have?
- What was one beautiful thing I saw today or this week?
- Which people in my life am I most grateful for and why?
- Who is one person that I don’t speak to often, but if I lost them it would be devastating. (Note: for a double boost of gratitude — take this prompt as a cue to reach out to that person today and write them a very specific gratitude letter about how they positively impacted your life).
- What am I better at today than I was a year ago?
- What material object do I use every day that I am thankful for?
- What has someone done for me recently that I am grateful for?
- What are the three things I am grateful for right now.
These are also great prompts for a Thanksgiving game that’s a perfect way to involve family members of all ages.
SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS! Please let me know what you thought of the episode. You can reach me on Instagram @LauraCoxKaplan or at She Said/She Said Podcast. I’d love to hear from you! And, if you’d like to share your thoughts to help others find us, please be sure to leave a review on Itunes.
Have a wonderful, safe, happy, and gratitude-filled Thanksgiving!
I’ll see you next week!